With endless meetings and partying this past few days, I get so tired.
I think I need a time out before Christmas. So I just had my whole body massage and I feel so great. I also got a chance to watch a movie that hubby downloaded since last week and I still have so many movies to watch but I know that I can’t make it this soon because of my busy schedule.
Just today, I had my meeting around 6pm and it was stressful. I deserve a break. I wanted to go out alone… just to think. Just to have a Me time but I don’t know when I can do it.
I still have gifts to wrap but I don’t have the energy to do it. Maybe I will do it tomorrow after my appointment.
Yes, Christmas is coming. Well, it was my favorite holiday before Ayumi died. Right now, I don’t feel like the same again. I am not that excited anymore. I am just doing it because everyone around me is doing it. Ayoko naman na ako pa ang KJ (Kill joy). I am trying to act normally. I am trying so hard…. That is why I get so tired because I am not really into it anymore.
Why I should Try? I know it is unfair sa mga tao sa paligid ko kung hindi ko i-celebrate ang pasko. Imagine kung walang christmas tree and gifts sa bahay, parang ang lungkot naman at dahil malungkot ako hindi naman ibig sabihin na dapat ang mga tao sa paligid ko ay magiging malungkot din.
So yon… Kailangan kong gawin kaya ginagawa ko.
But if I asked for space after this… I think I deserve it kasi nakakapagod at gusto ko din bigyan ng time ang sarili ko na makarecover.
That’s it… I am just tired.
Good night!