Looking back, I am checking if I feel any regrets after I loss my daughter. Everyday, I am evaluating myself if I have regrets but the answer is always NO.<\/p>\n
Since the day she was born, I gave everything. I love her until now. I show my love to her everyday. She is not just a daughter to me but my little bestfriend. I don’t shower my kids with material things but with love and comfort. Me and hubby are very showy to them. I checked all her needs and I spend most of my time with the kids.<\/p>\n
Everytime, I am away with them, I checked on them regularly as if I am with them 24 hours. They are our priority and our world.<\/p>\n
Since I got married, I always wanted to have kids. Actually, lots of kids. The first year of our marriage, I got pregnant but I lost the baby during 8 weeks. I stop for a while then after a year I got another one but still I lost the baby before the 3 months. I almost lost hope that time and I focus on my business then finally we try again.<\/p>\n
Then I have my first born, he is Gareth. Gareth is a healthy baby. Later, I found out that he has autism and it really breaks me into pieces. I was deeply hurt and wished to have a new baby that can call me mommy and hoping for a normal one.<\/p>\n
Not too long, I got pregnant again and so happy when we found out that it’s a girl. We are very excited buying pink baby items. The joys she brings to us is very unforgettable. The silent home become noisy and happy. I love it so much. I have the best of my life since then. Life seems so perfect.<\/p>\n
Until the day I lost Ayumi. Everything ended. The house is now quieter and I miss those days that she is with us. I miss how she made me laugh. I miss her calling to me endlessly. I miss her everyday! I miss hugging and kissing her while she is sleeping.<\/p>\n
I miss every piece of her.<\/p>\n
There are days that I need to bring out her clothes just to hug and kiss it. It seems that I am kissing and hugging her because I can still smell her through her clothes.<\/p>\n
If you can see, I am giving birth to angels. I don’t know but this things are hard to grasp. I give birth to much angels already and I think I contributed enough already.<\/p>\n
Whatever happened, I know in my heart that I don’t have regrets but of course there are days that I can only feel the anger. I still can’t accept that I lose my daughter. I still wish that she is here that she will be with us someday.<\/p>\n
I know that I give all my love to her. I shower her my greatest love and I hope it will make her feel good. I hope it will make her proud that she chooses us as her parents.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Looking back, I am checking if I feel any regrets after I loss my daughter. Everyday, I am evaluating myself if I have regrets but the answer is always NO. Since the day she was born, I gave everything. I love her until now. I show my love to her everyday. She is not just… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[196],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1196","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ayumi"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1196","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1196"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1196\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1200,"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1196\/revisions\/1200"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1196"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1196"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bubblymom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1196"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}