August 3, 2018
Still with a heavy heart, I get up and try to act normal.
We went to Ayumi’s renting place.
I talked to Xavier most of the time, specially those days when I was sad. He’s asking where is Ayumi and I always tell that him that she’s in heaven.
At the Resting Place
Xavier: Mommy is this heaven?
Me: (I don’t know what to say)
After that we went to the mall.
I am not really in the mood of doing things but it is so unfair with the kids. So we watched movie and we let them play and bought toys.
I acted normal but deep inside I am really mourning…
It’s been 5 years since she was gone but the pain is still the same…
There were better days…
and there were sad days!
But I already learn how to live despite having that pain.
It is already part of my system..
I can’t do something about it anymore…
I just appreciate whatever I have and give thanks to God for the blessings…
I believe that there are reasons for everything…
I trust God in everything and I know He has better plans…