Today is not just like any ordinary day. Today is the 11 month without my daughter. Everyday is battle between my mind and heart because there are times that I have questions why she’s gone too soon. As a mother, I know there are days that I am on my lowest point, specially if I miss her.

I am getting used to it. I am used to this pain that I carry everyday. I am used of missing her everyday. I am used for that special moment where I hardly wish so hard that she is still here with us. I am used to it and I will be like this forever.

Everytime I see kids on her age, I wonder how she will become. It seems that my future with her is taken away from me. I have no choice but to continue living and just wait for that special moment that we will be reunited again.

It’s 11 month already but it seems like yesterday. I miss her so much and everything about her seems so fresh. Everything will never be forgotten and I hope she will continue to watch over with us. I know she is happy right now in Heaven because Mama Mary and Jesus are taking care of her. I know that they can take care of my child more that I do.

The sad part is that Christmas is coming and we will try our best to celebrate it the way we used to be when Ayumi was still with us. I don’t want to disappoint her. I wanted her to see that we can make it through.

 

Grow your wings baby…

You are our little angel always.. We miss you so much!