January 3, 2020 It was Ayumi’s 7th Angelversary. I can’t believe that it’s been 7 years already. Parang kahapon lang… Masakit pa rin. I was so moody every time her death anniversary is coming. I can’t help but be sad and angry at the same time. I still have this feeling of anguish that I […]
Jan. 3, 2019 6th year Angel Anniversary of Ayumi… I was not feeling okay… ang hirap bumangon. Parang alam na alam ng katawan ko na hindi eto magandang araw. Tandang tanda ko pa rin lahat ng mga nangyari that day. Na minsan ay paulit ulit na bumabalik sa memory ko kaya minsan nadepress na naman […]
It’s been 5 years and 9 months since I lost her. As a Mother, I know I will never get over the pain. I even told hubby that if something bad happen to me, wag na nya akong iparevive. Just let me go kasi gusto ko ng makasama anak ko. Pero sabi nya hindi daw […]
August 3, 2018 Still with a heavy heart, I get up and try to act normal. We went to Ayumi’s renting place. I talked to Xavier most of the time, specially those days when I was sad. He’s asking where is Ayumi and I always tell that him that she’s in heaven. At the Resting […]
August 3, 2018 This is somehow a difficult time to write about. Today is Pillow’s 8th birthday. So I really don’t know what to do… I never have a plan. This should be a big event if only she’s here… Para akong ninakawan… marami pa sanang plano pero wala na… hindi na pwedeng gawin. I […]
Yesterday we visited Ayumi. It was always like this… When I accomplished something I needed to go back to her place. I need to see her… The more I need to talk to her… Because I know that somehow she is really guiding us. I know that whatever success we have, she is also behind […]
When you don’t know what to do, you better have a dessert it might make you feel better. It’s Ayumi’s 5th death anniversary and I am feeling down. I wanted to go somewhere.. I wanted to be in the beach and just let my mind and body relax but it seems that I can’t do […]
It’s been 5 years.. since I last hugged my Ayumi. I miss her everyday! I still don’t know how I made it this far. Maybe by God’s grace I was able to survive. Maybe I am trying to move on because I know there is nothing left to do. My life after her is […]
It’s this time of the year again… I never thought that I will be doing this.. I never thought that I will be the one visiting my child grave. It is not the right order of life, but I think this is what it is. It is written in my book of life to experience […]
Yes, I really don’t know how to celebrate her birthday and I’m not feeling okay. I had asthma attack for 2 days already. I am sneezing the whole time and I have a hard time breathing due to my cough. I can’t even go out yet because I still had fever. So we ended […]