August 3, 2018 Still with a heavy heart, I get up and try to act normal. We went to Ayumi’s renting place. I talked to Xavier most of the time, specially those days when I was sad. He’s asking where is Ayumi and I always tell that him that she’s in heaven. At the Resting…
August 3, 2018 This is somehow a difficult time to write about. Today is Pillow’s 8th birthday. So I really don’t know what to do… I never have a plan. This should be a big event if only she’s here… Para akong ninakawan… marami pa sanang plano pero wala na… hindi na pwedeng gawin. I…
I got these surprises from hubby. I am so thankful for all the efforts. Actually, I really don’t like celebrating Mother’s Day. When I lost my daughter, I stopped celebrating it. I don’t really feel the day anymore. When you lost a child, you will see things in way different than before. Everyday I have…
Yes, I really don’t know how to celebrate her birthday and I’m not feeling okay. I had asthma attack for 2 days already. I am sneezing the whole time and I have a hard time breathing due to my cough. I can’t even go out yet because I still had fever. So we ended…
I still clearly remember the day I first heard you cry… and I cherished it so much! Today we supposed to be celebrating your 7th birthday but without you, I don’t really know how to celebrate your day. I’m feeling down today and I’m not in the mood of doing anything! We just…
Yesterday is one of those crazy days of my life. I was working for almost 16 hours yesterday. I stayed in the office until 10am. It was crazy. I am not a morning person, kaya kapag naarawan ako, sumasakit talaga ang ulo ko. I really wanted to curl in bed in a very dark room.…
Sometimes I wake up wondering what’s going on with my life… I sometimes stop and wonder how I made it.. There are days that I wonder how I survived those hardships that I encounter from the past. When I saw Ayumi pictures, I can’t help but wonder how I survived her death. There are times…
January 3, 2017 It’s been 4 years already! Time flies so fast but still the pain is still the same. Though I learn how to live each day with the pain and I master of hiding the pain. I think everyone around me move on already but deep inside of me, I never move on.…
Last night hubby got a chance to check his videos archive and we happened to watch again some of the videos of Ayumi. We laugh a lot everytime we saw her kakulitans. We remember how lucky we are…
August 3, 2016 I still remember the day Ayumi was born. As a mom, I know that I will never ever forget that moment. It still feels like yesterday. The day before her birthday, I was not feeling well. I don’t have the energy to go out but still I force myself. I know that…