So True

This is so true. When I finally realized that I can’t have my daughter again, everything was hurt and I really can’t believe that it happened to me. That was during the first few months… But now, everything sink in already. Though I have a new baby already and busy caring for Xavier, there are […]

Heaven is For Real Movie

Last week, hubby and I decided to watched the movie Heaven is For Real with Xavier. When we went inside the cinema, Xavier was crying and hubby had no other choice but to go out first. Actually, I read the book before Ayumi died but watching the movie after my daughter died is a different […]

I miss the Me I Was when You Were Here..

                  Dear Ayumi, When I sleep last night, I really can’t help but feel so sad. I miss your hugs and kisses. I woke up and I feel that you are there. You’ve given mommy hugs and kisses and that I realized that you never left me. […]

Unloading Emotions

The baby is now on it’s 36th weeks and my OB scheduled to have my CS operation on March 10 but I have to have 1 more ultrasound to check the baby and if he is not stress then we will follow the March 10 schedule or else we will schedule it earlier. There are […]

3rd Floor

I have my appointment with my OB yesterday but before she let me have my usual check up she asked me to drop by at 3rd floor first to discuss with me about anesthesia. So, when I went to the hospital at around 1pm we went to 3rd floor right away. I stayed less than […]

Just Missing Her…

Last night while talking to hubby: Me: Did you miss her? Hubby: Of course.. everyday. Me: Really? Hubby: Yes Me: How not to miss her? Hubby: That is impossible… Yes.. that is really impossible because she is our child. A parent will miss her child every time we breath.

Missing My Ayumi

I miss my baby so much today. I wake up earlier than usual. I don’t know but I can’t go back to sleep. I want to hug her again. I really miss hugging and kissing her.                       How I wish she is still with us… […]

Suddenly..

Last Monday was so toxic. I was so worried because Gareth has high fever. So hubby decided to bring him to the hospital. Yes, since what happened to Ayumi, we are always paranoid when Gareth is sick. We really can’t sleep well. I keep on monitoring his temperature and even though we keep on giving […]